single girl's desperation..

no.. this is NOT about me!

superbowl single girl

a girl in new york named amy is raising money to run a tv ad during the superbowl. what is she trying to sell? herself. technically she's trying to find herself a husband and feels an ad during the superbowl will bring her closer to finding her mr. right.

she's accepting donations from $0.01 to corporate sponsorship. i wonder if one of the beer companies will take this on..

nigerian "bachelor catcher"

courtesy of the bbc: 'bachelor catcher' roams nigeria

some excerpts:

Until 1 October, Kano's "Bachelor catcher" and his band of musicians will roam the streets, parading a bachelor they have caught in a noose.
...
The Sarkin Nalako dresses up like a hunter, and his bachelor prey is paraded around with a rough noose around his neck and indigo dye smeared on his face.

man, oh man..  i'm amused :)  that is all.

why hershey's continues to suck

read here and here.

if you're too lazy to read, hershey's changed their formula. no longer do some of their packages say "milk chocolate" because there isn't any in the actual product. they replaced their cocoa butter with vegetable oil. blech.

i never really liked hershey's and this is just another reason to hate it more.

murphy's law: what can go wrong.. will go wrong.

i hadn't seen vidya in a long time and wasn't able to join her on her dancing adventures since i think.. last year?! anyway, her birthday was yesterday, so i decided i needed to celebrate with her. the point of the evening was to find vidya a boy. amusing concept because i was the only other single girl there and suck at being a wingman (wingwoman? wingperson?). i guess my issue is i go clubbing to dance, and only dance. i'll be social with friends, friends of friends, and friends of friends of friends (you get my drift..). so the concept of going up to some random person in a club is foreign to me. i suppose it's really a good way to get some hilarious stories though.

anyway, vidya's free spirit attracted a clan of spikey-haired ginos. it all started by vidya touching the hair of one of the guys as we were walking by him. he joined our little dancing group and stuck with us the entire night. vidya was confused by him, "who does he like?!" i don't know.. he didn't try to dance with any single one of us, or chatted any person up. i figured he found us entertaining and wasn't the type to go around hitting on girls like his friends so he just stuck with us. i don't remember his name, so he will forever be known as gino #1. his friends, on the other hand, who constantly roam the dancefloor would come back to us now and again for a break and i guess to check up on their friend.

i proved myself to be very white that night knowing the words to all the 80s pop, 90s alternative, and some classic rock the dj sneaked into his set. it was a great night for dancing, i enjoyed it! this is the first time i stayed at a club until it shut down for the night. then again.. closed at 2:30am? what's that about?!

off we headed (vidya, karen, and i) to burrito boyz since vidya's never had it and i was parked up the street from the place. it never fails: every time i go there's always some cop in there waiting silently in the corner for his burrito. that burrito totally hit the spot.. i've been having cravings for the past month!

we walked out and looked up the street.. wow no cars. wait.. NO CARS! where's MY car?! oh crap, oh crap. where's my car? i look up at the sign, "no standing after 2am". oh.. !%^@$&#. i've never experienced having any car towed before whether i needed it to be or not. so as we were walking to find a cab, i saw a tow truck driver. "i'm pretty sure my car was towed. do you know where it is?" luckily he did and told us where to go. found a cab and off we went. we got lectured by the cab driver during the entire five minute drive, "you should read the signs.. tow truck drivers are vultures.. blah blah blah." i was more concerned about my car than making conversation with the driver.

we got to the place and there was a line up inside the trailer office at 3am. the guy in front of us didn't have his shirt on. was he hot? no.. his face was bloodied up and got all over his shirt. we noticed that we were the only girls in there.. apparently there are many girls who are much smarter than me in toronto! one of the guys in line was told his car was in suspension for 12 hours, so he couldn't get it out until tomorrow. they didn't give him a reason why, which got me slightly worried. i asked one of the guys in line, "so.. how much is it to get a car out?" $172.. ugh. you've got to be kidding me. when i got to the front of the line, i gave the releaser-of-cars my licence plate.

me: do you have my car..?
releaser-of-cars: you didn't call the police to check?
me: no. i was told by a tow truck driver that it was probably here.
releaser-of-cars: you should always call the police and they will track it down for you. but yes, i do have your car.
me: yes! you're my new best friend.
releaser-of-cars: $142. am i still your best friend?
me: yes cause it's cheaper than i was expecting.
releaser-of-cars: yay!

so i went to get my car from the lot while the other two waited outside since only the driver was allowed in. i got to my car and the keyless doesn't work. (there are some areas downtown that just doesn't agree with my key fob). so i had to unlock the door with my key.. *honk* *honk* *honk* (the honking starts off softly and gets louder and louder) i go to start my car.. the honking stops but the car wouldn't start. then my key wouldn't come out of the ignition. NOT AGAIN! (my key got stuck in the ignition back in april i think. in order to get it out each time, i had to violate the steering column to get to the manual release. luckily it was a warranty problem, so the dealer put in a new ignition mechanism thingy - how technical of me, i know.) i violate the steering column to get the key out. and then go to try to start the car again. nothing. my battery was okay cause all the lights were working. what could it be?! one of the guys who worked there noticed i didn't come out so he came in my direction. tried to start my car.. nothing. pressed the gas pedal while starting.. nothing. then looked to the right.. shifted from drive to park. et voilà. DUH REENA. like i said, i've never had a car towed before and wanted to be in my bed, so i was in no mood to be logical.

i took vidya and karen home - it was the least i could do considering they stayed with me during this entire ordeal. trying to get onto yonge was interesting. street signs kept telling me i wasn't allowed to turn north onto yonge. ugh. i could have ignored the street signs, but considering how the night has been going i was not going to risk having a meet and greet with a police officer. nuh uh, no way. not at 4am. somehow we ended up in the casa loma area. i HATE this area. it makes no sense to me and i always get lost.. ALWAYS. this was no different. driving.. driving.. all i see are endless houses, speed bumps, winding roads, and no escape. fifteen minutes later we managed to get ourselves into an area where streets make sense. i dropped vidya and karen off and i headed home. nothing exciting happened from that point on. or if something did, i never noticed. i just wanted my bed! by 5am i was home.. *sigh*

lessons learned:

1. i need to master the art of being a wingwoman. apparently this is more helpful for guy friends than girl friends though.


2. read ALL the signs


3. keep the number of the police stored on my phone. no, that's not 911


4. i should use my gps more often than not..

hello, this is nigeria calling..

two or so weeks ago i got four missed calls.  hrmm.. who in the world is that desperate to get in contact with me?  the number was long distance, so i looked up the country code.  +234 = nigeria.  interesting.. who do i know in nigeria?  could it be mr. mamba requesting help to recover money that may be lost due to the death of a client and their entire family?  or maybe it was mr. okemadu wanting help to attain money that is now in limbo due to a debunked construction contract.

i have no idea who's calling.  they called again later that day.  the phone would ring twice, hang up.  ring twice, hang up.  ring twice, hang up.  ring twice, hang up.  what's with the actions in even numbers?  weird.  the fourth time i managed to answer the phone.  "hello?  hello.. heeelllloooo..?  anyone home?  my bologna has a first name, it's o-s-c-a-r.  my bologna has a second name, it's m-a-y-e-r.  ..." at this point i stopped and waited for the person on the other end to finish the song (because who doesn't know the lyrics to the oscar mayer jingle?).  nope, nothing.  pure silence.

i never got a call again.. until last night.  again they called four times.  same routine too - ring twice, hang up.  i never called the number back on my lan line out of fear that it's really a sex line that will charge me a ridiculous amount of money per minute, plus a connection fee, an entertainment fee, a privacy service fee, plus the cost to make the long distance call in the first place.  i was not prepared to possibly face a $200 phone bill for my 30 seconds of curiosity.  nuh-uh, no way.

for those who are braver than i, here's the number: +234 80 3580 7180.  knock yourselves out.  if anyone does call, please let me know.  i'm really curious to know why i have a nigerian stalker.

university gives guarantee students will complete their degree in four years

"The University of Calgary's new graduation guarantee pledges to pay for tuition costs if first-year students can't complete their degrees on time.  The university is calling its graduation guarantee the first of its kind in Canada. It's open to first-year students enrolled in the faculties of science, arts, social studies and culture and communications.  Students must promise to maintain a full course load, keep up their grades and declare a major by the end of their first year.  They must also meet regularly with an assigned academic adviser before registering for classes to ensure they're on track to graduate on time.  In exchange, the university pledges to ensure required courses are available, have academic advisers advocate for students when scheduling conflicts arise and pay for tuition of any additional courses required beyond the four years of classes."

does anyone think this is absolute bull?  seriously, anyone?  it's definitely a marketing ploy.. full stop.

ensuring required courses are available and advisors advocating for students when scheduling conflicts arise are the responsibility of the university to begin with!  you, as a university, are obligated to provide these services in return for the obscene amount of money we give you every four months.  it is also the responsibility of the student to make sure they are on top of their scheduling - making sure they are following their degree requirements.

what about the students who don't sign this pledge?  when they seek help will the university fulfill their obligation to the student or fall back and say "you didn't sign the pledge.  sorry, can't help you."  will advisors make less of an effort for these students when dealing with conflicts?

i completed all requirements for my four-year honours degree.. within three years in fact.. while maintaining a full time job the entire time.  there were a couple of times there was a conflict, but i worked it out with my advisor.  whether they helped me rework my schedule, find something else that would fit that is of interest, or take it as a distance education course, at least they gave me options.  a required class was full?  the academic advisor made the changes necessary for me to take it.  scheduling, planning, anticipating is all part of life - deal with it.  if kids don't learn now, when will they?

car kareoke

this morning on my way to work a ford explorer pulls up behind me at a stop light. the suv for a man's man of course. the driver was a guy in his 50s or so.

he was singing along to a song..

that i happened to be listening to on the radio..

pussycat dolls - when i grow up